Sunday, January 14, 2007

Volcano Head's Little Trick

It’s like this, as a result of a recent (and temporary) reduction in my workload, I went hog-wild in my little pottery shop for a few days. As I often do, I failed to take into consideration my diminished physical capacity resulting from so many years spent toiling at the keyboard. It’s all about the stretching you know. I’m certain that my spine has been reduced to kindling. What is left of it lies in a pile somewhere between my dwindled liver and equally shriveled testicular canister. I’m typing this note with the only appendage left with any feeling in it at all, thank Zeus for that “Y” chromosome. As sitting for more than two or three minutes at a time is just too painful, I’ve been unable to spend any meaningful time posting or visiting other blogs. I predict a few more days before I’m back to normal, so for now, I’m taking the easy way out.

21 Comments:

Blogger Hammer said...

Hope your appendages feel better soon ;)

3:01 PM, January 14, 2007  
Blogger Orhan Kahn said...

What is left of it lies in a pile somewhere between my dwindled liver and equally shriveled testicular canister.

LOL!

4:29 PM, January 14, 2007  
Blogger Stucco said...

Heyya Hammer, sounds like it's time for a lappy. Surfing while laying down is a acquired ability. Hope you feel better soon.

4:43 PM, January 14, 2007  
Blogger slaghammer said...

Hey Hammer, I do too, some more that others.

Hi Orhan, the truth is an ugly, ugly thing.

Hi Stucco, I’m thinking, a lap dance might not be the best thing for me at this time. Then it hits me, that’s not at all what you are talking about. My work situation practically requires a desktop rig and every attempt to rationalize bringing a “lappy” into the family has fallen short. I guess now I have a reason. And so it has come to this, I need a computer I can take to bed with me. I can see some definite benefit to that scenario but it is still a sad, sad day.

3:04 AM, January 15, 2007  
Blogger Judith said...

Slag
Hope all your ailments are soothed away in the form of comfort food, the love of a good woman and mind bending drugs!

4:06 AM, January 15, 2007  
Blogger Glamourpuss said...

I think your initial thought is correct - lap dancing is an art that requires a strong, flexible spine. Learn to lapdance and you're troubles are over. Worked for me anyway...

Oh, and do you throw pots with your appendage? That I'd like to see...

Puss

5:26 AM, January 15, 2007  
Blogger slaghammer said...

Hi Judith, check, check and check. All of the prerequisites are there for a smooth and speedy recovery.

Hey Glamourpuss, I think to get the full therapeutic benefits of lapdancing, in my case anyway, I would have to be the lapdancee and not the lapdancer. Not that I haven’t been known to bust a move in my quest to maintain breeding rights with Jilly. My favorite and most consistently successful maneuver is the courtship dance of the Bird of Paradise with random vocalizations of your common peacock thrown in as an added bit of insurance, Jilly falls for it ever time.
Btw, I’m working on a pottery technique that utilizes all of my appendages but I can’t seem to stay focused long enough to complete the process…

11:33 AM, January 15, 2007  
Blogger Rav3nn's angel said...

I like they way u think...

12:17 PM, January 15, 2007  
Blogger slaghammer said...

Hi Rav3nn’s Angel, thanks for dropping by, btw, your blog, what language, Scandinavian? Dutch?

3:31 PM, January 15, 2007  
Blogger Crankster said...

Poor Slaghammer--yet another victim to art. Hope you're feeling better soon!

4:47 PM, January 15, 2007  
Blogger Kara said...

A likely tale. I know the signs of cult-joining when I see them. What have those scientologist bastards done to you!

5:08 PM, January 15, 2007  
Blogger slaghammer said...

Hey Crankster, pottery is a jealous lover, nothing but nag, nag, nag all day long and never satisfied and always wants more. I put up with it because I know no other medium will have me. I tried to make a go of it with sketch and paint but they got bored with me after it became apparent that I had no “talent,” like that matters. I guess I could go back to metal casting but I’d rather play in the mud and end up a hunched over geezer.

Hi Kara, the only cult I’ve ever fallen under the spell of were the Methodists. They were all into fig leaves and something about animals in a boat. I don’t recall any reptiles or aliens, unless you count Jesus as an alien love child… it’s all very complicated and it was a long time ago.

12:35 AM, January 16, 2007  
Blogger skinnylittleblonde said...

LOL, I know it's true...too much time at the keyboard & not enough time, uh, stretching.

2:42 AM, January 18, 2007  
Blogger Scott from Oregon said...

you have a cannister for your testicles?

10:32 AM, January 18, 2007  
Blogger slaghammer said...

Hi Skinny, I’m glad somebody understands. You have to stretch every day and sometimes even three times day to stay healthy…hey…wait a minute…

Hey Scott, no, I meant to say, “bunker.” That is embarrassing, talk about a Freudian slip.

11:24 AM, January 18, 2007  
Blogger madpotter said...

Take care of that body, Slag! I've been on a huge pottery binge, too! Are the planets tugging on some primeval potter's gene or something? I'm skipping meals and have some nasty tarpal cunnel so I can't dispense with any lectures on health. I hope you get to feeling better and find some comfort, even if it's staring through the bottom of an empty bottle!

9:26 AM, January 19, 2007  
Blogger slaghammer said...

Hey Madpotter, another of my potter friends went into a frenzy at the same time you and I did, a very strange coincidence for sure. At this point, I have my work cut out for me. The stuff I’m throwing is too big to fit more than one or two at a time in my raku kiln which means lots of firing cycles to get it all done. I predict another round of chiropractors and much bellyaching before it’s over.

5:41 PM, January 19, 2007  
Blogger R2K said...

Love this page.

8:13 AM, January 21, 2007  
Blogger slaghammer said...

Hi R2K, I do too.

11:16 AM, January 21, 2007  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

11:38 PM, February 10, 2007  
Blogger slaghammer said...

Hey, I didn't remove any damn comment. What the hell?

12:30 AM, March 15, 2007  

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